If there’s one thing I’m really good at, it’s efficiency. It’s one of those things I geek out on.
For example, I buy rice from the bulk bin and come home to find it fits EXACTLY in the jar I have. I know precisely when to order supplies for the house so we never run out. I have a place for everything on my schedule and I generally know where my body is in time and space.
My efficiency annoys those close to me. I don’t like to waste a minute. I can’t have any clutter on the kitchen counter. You get the gist.
When I was dating online years ago, there was a multiple choice question asking about my strongest traits. I couldn’t not check “I maintain an organized life”. I like to think this is a sign of enlightenment. 🙂
In my Aikido practice, I saw how efficient the great martial arts masters were in their movements. With barely a flick of the wrist, they’d send multiple attackers to the floor. New people watching would stare with their eyes popped open in their sockets.
Besides economy of energy, the biggest thing 4 years of Aikido taught me was that responding– and how we do it– is a choice. It taught me to find joy and power in receiving. And that when we respond appropriately, we naturally become efficient because we’re not wasting any energy on reacting or resisting.
Life is always giving us stuff to respond to. To pretend it’s not– or to try to close ourselves off – means we live in resistance. And no matter how intense your problems feel, resistance is the biggest thing that keeps us from healing and growing. Basically, it keeps the problems in place and causes new ones. 🙁
When we aren’t taking care of ourselves or are emotionally triggered, it’s easy to react. Have you ever noticed that things you say in those moments aren’t so well received? Or that actions you take as a push-back against something don’t bear the best fruit?
I am learning more each day how important it is to respond. Sometimes, the best response is to do nothing– just step aside and let someone go by. Other times, it’s most efficient to step in and connect, even for a second. And once in a while, we need to get in someone’s face to break a pattern and move some energy.
I think for a long time, I misunderstood efficiency. I ignored or avoided a lot of things that required a response, not realizing that the response would be easier than the resistance. And I also gave some things wayyyyyy more attention than they required.
How could you improve your efficiency and powers of responding today? Here are some ideas…
- Meditate. Sit with your eyes closed and breathe, practice clearing or grounding techniques, or do yoga or other mind-body practice. Find a way to center yourself daily and you’ll find it easier to respond.
- Before you react, look at your goals. In the face of whatever is triggering you, ask yourself what you’d like to feel, have or experience instead. Then, ask yourself what kind of response will take you towards your goal. Choose that.
- Make a list of everything you’ve been avoiding or resisting. These could be little things or big things, for example: a health issue or an email to return. These things drain your energy. Write down 1 action step for each thing on your list, and a date by which you will take it.
- Clear out what’s unnecessary. That may mean your bedroom closet or the junk in your car, it could be a toxic relationship or pattern, or you might need to be more conscious with your speech. Check to be sure your words, actions, choices and possessions are all serving a purpose.
I hope you enjoy these tips and find them helpful. If it’s hard, know that it’s worth it. As we master our power to respond, so much more energy gets freed up to enjoy our lives!
Need some help so you can stop reacting or get out of resistance? We are all human and I’d love to support you! Book a private session here.