In the first few months of pregnancy, I crashed on the couch by 7 pm many nights. I used to be called “the energizer bunny”— I could work, cook, exercise, socialize, do chores, and sing and dance from morning until night. But suddenly, so much of that energy was needed to literally build a body inside my body. No wonder I was tired!
I’ve been pretty good about my self-care, but being pregnant takes it to a whole new level. While it was initially challenging to watch my grumpy partner come home to no dinner and a sink full of dishes, or to say no to friends wanting my time, or to let go and trust that things will get handled without my doing them—now, I have come to relish the increased permission for self-care that pregnancy has allowed me.
And now that I have it, I want everyone to have it. Whether pregnant or not.
I am in a unique position, because all I have to do is point out the baby in my belly and people want to carry things for me, tell me to relax and give me space. It wasn’t that way before getting pregnant. And I didn’t always treat myself so well, either.
But now that I am, I wish in some ways I had done it all along! I look back at times in the past where I gave my energy away– for example I freely gave time to others when my personal, financial or emotional needs were not getting met—and I feel excited now to have no choice but to transform that pattern!
And here is why I want this for all of us. We all have an inner child inside of us. For most of us, that child has not been 100% loved and supported the way we would hope.
When we get angry or irritated, that is a sign our needs are not getting met. And while it may seem easier to blame another person or group for what they are doing “wrong” or not doing “right,” that attitude only makes it harder for everyone—especially ourselves– in the long run.
So I’d love to see all of us—whether pregnant or not—embrace our inner child and our true needs. Let your frustration be a clue, not a problem to repress or indulge. Have the courage to take care of yourself as if you were nurturing something precious inside of you.
As I’ve honored my needs more and more, my partner has adjusted and stepped up to help—often more than I think to ask for! I have business help that’s allowed me to be more successful as I do the jobs I love and let go of the ones I don’t. We have someone who loves to cook help prepare our meals– and since we feel nurtured, we have more to give to each other and the world.
I envision a peaceful world with everyone living in their mastery, joyfully doing the things they are best at. No one has to be a superhero, everyone deserves to be nurtured, and our true feelings and needs ARE safe to share!
What or who are you pregnant with, and what would help you feel really supported today?
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copyright 2012 Ann O’Brien- All Rights Reserved.